Monday, May 31, 2010

I Read The News Today Oh Boy


Yong Tsui chained his son, Yong Fai, to a street post for the roadside sale in Wuhan, central China.

The father(and I use the term loosely) chained the boy and went about setting up a table nearby to take bids on the youngster.

It is hard to believe, but passers-by did start bidding. Other's were shocked.

The police believed the father was acting out of love, not greed.

"He has no job, no home and no money," the report quoted an officer as saying. "He says he wasn't interested in the money, just finding a home for the boy."


President Obama and family arrived in Chicago yesterday with plans to spend a low key Memorial Day weekend. The oil spill in the Gulf Coast did not seem to bother the President.

Obama worked out twice playing basketball on Saturday and visiting a private gym on Sunday but otherwise stayed close to the security perimeter around their Hyde Park house, thus showing the American public being leader of the country is a trying experience that he is fed up with and he needs so me time.

Late Saturday afternoon, the Obama family including the first lady's mother, brother and sister-in-law ventured out for several hours to the visited the home of Marty Nesbitt, a Chicago businessman and close Obama friend who lives a few blocks away.


They walked to and from his house, where House he held a backyard barbecue. On Sunday the family remained in the confines of the Obama home.

The President plans to visit a nearby cemetary in Elgin tomorrow, but will not be at Arlington National Cemetary to pay tribute and respect those that died in service to our country.


It had to come to this;


Five female news presenters at the pan-Arab Al-Jazeera satellite television channel have resigned over conflicts with management over dress code and other issues, a journalist there said on Sunday.

The Simpsons have it right;

Fish recently taken from the Connecticut River near Montpelier Vermont recently tested positive for radioactive strontium-90. The probable cause of this contamination focused on the nearby Vermont Yankee nuclear power plant.

Fish taken from the Connecticut River recently tested positive for radioactive strontium-90. Operators of the troubled 38-year-old nuclear plant on the banks of the river, where work is under way to clean up leaking radioactive tritium, revealed this month that it also found soil contaminated with strontium-90, an isotope linked to bone cancer and leukemia.

A few days later, officials said a fish caught four miles upstream from the reactor in February had tested positive for strontium-90 in its bones. State officials say they don't believe the contamination came from Vermont Yankee.

Would you like shrimp cocktail as an appetizer;



B.P. attempt to plug up the gushing oil well by packing it with mud failed. I knew it would. I don't know why no one asked me. I would have told them it was a waste of time. As a young tyke I had lots of experience with mud and water in various neighborhood sites and I came to the conclusion that mud, no matter how heavy won't stop water. So why would they think it would stop oil.

I am thinking that restaurants will begin asking customers if they would like their shrimp fried in 10W40.

Yo-ho-ho Senor


ZAPATA, Texas (AP) - The waters of Falcon Lake normally beckon boaters with waterskiing and world-record bass fishing. But this holiday weekend, fishermen on the waters that straddle the U.S.-Mexico border are on the lookout for something more sinister: pirates.

Twice in recent weeks, fishermen have been robbed at gunpoint by marauders that the local sheriff says are "spillover" from fighting between rival Mexican drug gangs.

Boaters are concerned about their safety, and the president of the local Chamber of Commerce is trying to assure people that everything's fine on the U.S. side of the lake. Chamber spokesperson Melissa Jane Whawpere stated, "I didn't see no pirates. There ain't no pirates there."

Friday, May 14, 2010

I Read The News Today Oh Boy

You can't make this stuff up.

Never...I repeat NEVER steal crayons at CVS Pharmacy!



Anthony Kyser was killed after he was caught by an alert and rather overbearing CVS drug store employee who spotted Mr. Kyser filling his pockets with crayons and toothpaste.

This past Saturday morning the employee went after Kyser and made a citizens arrest.  When Kyser resisted, the un-named employee put Kyser in a choke hold. Mr. Kyser later died. The medical examiner ruled it a homicide.


No charges have been filed against the store employee.  Now members of the Chicago community are up in arms against the Chicago Police for ignoring a homicide.  Kyser's ex-wife Ann Marie Balboa said she wants justice served.

"I want the man that killed my ex-husband to pay for what he did," she said.

Allow me to translate the above sentence. "I want that man that killed the wife-beatin', 40 ounce guzzlin', lyin', cheatin' low down thief that I kicked out of my house, I want that man that offed my ol' man to pay me 'cause I deserve it. In fact CVS is a big company with deep pockets. They should be payin' me too."

The police initially said it was accident. But the department late Thursday issued a statement saying it has an "active" investigation open.

And this just in;

A month long under-cover investigation nets an 87 year-old grandma for selling crack cocaine to undercover police. 


Ola Mae Agee aka Nannah was collared after the Escambia County Sheriff's Office targeted her dealing drugs out of her Pensacola Florida home.

She later was release on her own recognizance after telling police, "I was just fixin' up a batch of The Remedy.  Honest, I would never do nothing wrong. No sir."

Let's head South to;

Beautiful Sandy Springs Georgia, where the town motto is:

We Don't Cotton Up to no Terrorists, 'specially Them Damned Yankees!"

A fourteen-year-old autistic boy is facing terrorist charges after alert teachers procurred a drawing the young lad made. 

The sketch shows two stick-figures. One is labeled "Me" and the other "Mr. Harfman" who is the precocious little skamp's teacher.

Mother Karen Finn says that her son, 8th grader Shane Finn, doesn’t understand why he is in trouble. She says the boy is autistic and has the mental capacity of a 3rd grader.

Troubled officials at Ridgeview Charter School say the student will face a  tribunal.

Although not Mirandized, young Shane is charged with making terrorist threats. 

This troubles me.  We have to Mirandize actual terrorist and we cannot make them face a military tribunal, yet an Eighth grade austistic child can be dragged in front of a schools tribunal.

Thursday, May 06, 2010

Do Not Drink and Drive In a Barbie Dream Car

Take care!  There is an intoxicated madman speeding down the road. But he is not driving a Ferrari or a Porsche or even a a Lamborghini.   No sir. This drunken maniac was caught weaving down a street in the town of Essex in the UK.

Essex police arrested Paul Hutton and cited him for driving under the influence while driving a pink Barbie toy car.

Paul Hutton, a former RAF aeronautical engineer, was helping his son with a project for his car mechanics course when he decided that he simply had to take the car out for a spin. Maxing out at 4mph, the Barbie car can be tough to handle when you've had a snoot full and your mental capacity can sometimes lead you to act like you’re a kid again.

It is hard to determine what was more embarrassing: driving around in a pink Barbie car or receiving a DUI from the Essex Constabulary while driving around in a pink Barbie car.

When asked by members of the press, Hutton replied:

"You have to be a contortionist to get in, and then you can’t get out. I was very surprised to get done for drunk-driving but I was a twit to say the least.”

Yes, sir, to say the least. Hutton received a three year ban from driving only because this was his second DUI in ten years.
The judge’s comments?

"The vehicle is not even capable of doing the speed of a mobility scooter and could be outrun by a pedestrian. I find the defendant guilty and order him to stay 100 feet away from any Barbie dream car, GI Joe action jeep or Hello Kitty scooter."