Sunday, October 18, 2015

You May Be A Muslim

If you refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor; you may be a Muslim.

If you own a $300 machine gun and a $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can’t afford shoes; You may be a Muslim.

If you have more wives, than teeth; You may be a Muslim.

If you wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean; You may be a Muslim.

If you think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide; You may be a Muslim.

If you can’t think of anyone you haven’t declared Jihad against; You may be a Muslim.

If you consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing; You may be a Muslim.

If you have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four; You may be a Muslim.

If you get all hot and bothered seeing a woman's bare ankle; You may be a Muslim.

If your cousin is President of the United States; You may be a Muslim.

If you find this offensive or racist; You may be a Muslim.

If you are a Muslim and disagree with the above stereotypes, then why don't you do something to change the attitude of those extremists who want the world to return to the 12th century?

Linny at 15

I took this picture of my girlfriend, Linny, when she was only 15 years old. We had stopped at Campbell County park on an overcast summer day. I think my Mom and brothers were on the other side of the lake, while Linny and I took a walk. At the time I had a really cheap old camera that used film. The original photograph had some electric lines running across the top of the picture. I was able to remove those but cutting and pasting the sky.

I thought perhaps the picture would look better if I cropped it and centered Linny.

I attempted to lighten it up using Piccassa.

I also made it more abstract by softening the focus. I kind of like this image.

I made one small update to the picture. I am satisfied.

Monday, October 12, 2015

The Kluck Klams

I started reading the newspaper when I was about 11 years old. My folks subscribed to the Cincinnati Post (and Time Star) and got the Sunday Cincinnati Enquirer.

I would lie on the living room floor and read the editorials, especially Bob Brumfield's column. He had a great outlook on current events and life in general.

I read the news of what was going on in the world and in our fair city, but I saved the best for last; The comic strips. By far my favorite strip was Pogo. It was drawn and written by Walt Kelly. He had one thumb on the pulse of the day's news events and the other was on his nose, thumbing it at politicians and assorted characters of the day.

He drew political figures the way he saw them. For instance, Nixon was a spider, Spiro Agnew was a hyena, Fidel Castro was a goat, Nikita Khrushchev was a pig and J. Edgar Hoover was a cat.

Perhaps my favorite strip was called the Kluck Klams. This one especially hit home when I moved my family to Middletown Ohio and found that the town was headquarters for the local branch. I used to see those idiots parading up and down Breiel Boulevard with their robes and pointy hats. They tried to stir the pot once and cause a riot in a local park. I saw the video on the news and it was more of a sissy slap fight.

But here is Walt Kelly's take on a sad part of our history.

Bernie Sanders - The Wizard of Oz - Separated at Birth

You be the judge. CNN has been promoted Socialist Extraordinaire Bernie Sanders this week to hike their ratings for the ...yawn...Democratic Presidential debate. This debate promises to entertain us with views from J. Edgar Hoover worst nightmare: Bernie Sanders, I'm sorry I broke the law and I hope you forgot all the crap that went on when my husband was president; Hillary Clinton and comedian and joker; Joe Biden.

In watching Bernie Sander's sourpuss all week I realized he bore a very strong resemblance to this guy that used to scare the "jibblies" out of me when I was a kid.

But then I saw the other half of the party and realized something. Friends, we all should be scared, because I think I'm on to something!