Wednesday, February 04, 2009

The Hangnail Fairy

I know that you have all grown up and been told about The Tooth Fairy that leaves money under your pillow.


And of course The Sandman comes every night and sprinkles magic dust in your eyes that causes you to fall asleep. Why you may even have some left there in the morning.

But you seldom hear about the most evil fairy of all and yet you go to bed with perfectly intact fingernails, yet in the morning when you wake up....there is a hangnail.

Children I am going to tell you a secret.


The Hangnail Fairy creeps into your bedroom at around 3 AM every other month on a Thursday night. She takes out her evil tools and goes to work on your fingernails by breaking off an end just enough to annoy you. And in the blink of an eye she is gone.

The only thing The Hangnail Fairy fears in Vietnamese women. Because it is estimated that 85% of all Vietnamese women are licensed nail technicians and can thwart the evil Hangnail Fairy's dastardly acts.

So my advice to all you kids out there is to set your alarm clock for 3 AM on Thursday nights to catch the Hangnail Fairy before she catches you.


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