I learned these lyrics from an old TV show called Mad Movies With The L.A. Connection.
The show was done in a Los Angeles movie theater. Old movies were shown with the sound turned off, four or five actors provided voices that made the movie stars sound like they were saying absurd words, and it was a riot.
One of the programs featured an actor singing this version of Greensleeves. It made me feel like a third grader again.
I WEAR LOTS OF LACE UPON MY SHIRT
SO WHEN I WIPE MY NOSE IT DOESN'T HURT.
YOU THINK IT IS DISGUSTING, BUT NO ONE KNOWS
BECAUSE MY SLEEVES ARE GREEN AND IT DOESN'T SHOW.
GREENSLEEVES HAVE BEEN MY SALVATION,
THEY'VE SAVED MY FROM EMBARRASSING SITUATIONS,
GREENSLEEVES ARE TRIED AND TRUE,
THEY'VE WORKED FOR ME AND THEY'LL WORK FOR YOU.